Episode 5 starts off with a flashback of Geoffrey Wilder in prison (with some horrible wig on) 18 years before the series started. While in prison, he is met with a generous proposition from a mysterious man in a suit (always a good thing, right?). The man wants to buy a piece of land in a run down area for 5 million dollars, the catch? Wilder needs to convince one of his incarcerated fellow gang member to take the fall for shooting someone named Osiris so that Wilder can cash in on the deal and be a partner to this mystery man whom he’s never met and didn’t even leave a name or contact info…sounds legit.
Cut to the present where Alex is in the back of an SUV being driven by the same gang members who confronted Geoffrey in episode 2, one of whom took the fall for Geoffrey 18 years earlier, hence the kidnapping. The girls meet up to try and find Alex and contact Chase, who is busy bonding with his dad over their love of building shit that shouldn’t exist in 2017. Alex is briefed on the situation by his kidnapper, Darius, who reveals, not surprisingly to Alex, that his father reneged on his promise to take care of him and his family. He then contacts Geoffrey and informs him that he wants 1 million dollars to return Alex unharmed.
Alex clumsily gets to know one of his abductors that’s close to his age and the writers give their best after school special impersonation by reminding us that Alex is rich and his captors live in the hood with little opportunity. Geoffrey shows up, does his best John Wick impersonation, and quickly dispatches a few of the men. Alex, using his father’s gun that he acquired in the last episode, shoots one in the back of the head before being subdued by the ringleader and placed in the truck once again. The captors drive off, unknowingly being tailed by the girls. At a stop light, Molly and Nico get out of the car with Molly using her super strength to lift up the car so it can’t drive off. Karolina uses her power to glow to distract them as Chase shows up with his newly finished Fistogons to take down Darius before he drives off.
Alex rushes off to confront his father and finds him putting Andre, the younger of the kidnappers in the car. After a heated exchange with Geoffrey, Alex is forced to get on a bus and go home. Geoffrey calls his wife and reveals his intention to sacrifice Andre. Alex regroups with his crew and after some mild deliberation, decide to try and save Andre. The kids arrive and find that their parents aren’t in the space where they sacrificed Destiny. Distraught, Alex leaves and is comforted by Nico and…well what do you think happened? (It’s Disney so, PG).
Back at the ritual with the parents, the sacrifice works. Andre has vanished in a bright glow of light and Karolina’s mother seems relieved that it worked. The Wilder’s return home and Geoffrey comes to talk to Alex, attempting to reassure him that Andre is okay. Alex puts some bass in his voice and tells his pops what’s what which cause Geoffrey to do some more cringe worthy “street” gestures (seriously, the writers have no business trying to bring that kind of thing to life), Alex storms off. After which, his mother pretty much orders the death of Darius.
The episode ends with a montage of the kids coming to the realization that their parents are basically serial killers and they have fucked up lives, despite being privileged as all hell and Chase discovering his father created a time machine and also that he has brain caner. Thus, creating the inevitable conflict that will drive Chase to be sympathy towards his abusive father…who also happens to be apart of a cult of serial killers. We end the episode with a glimpse of the future, via the time machine, and the city is in ruin and also that the mystery man from the beginning of the episode was also the creepy, wrinkly skinned dude Karolina’s mom had been hiding…cuz, TV.
See ya next week!